Inductive, Introspective, Intrusive,…Something Like That…

Posted: November 22, 2013 in Monday Meme
Tags: , , , ,

Good grief!  I take one post off, and my firsty almost assigns me a two pack a day habit!  Still, there is a vice even more insidious than smoking, and this week Strawberry is encouraging us to indulge in that vice: introspection.  To paraphrase Douglas Adams, (because I don’t remember for certain which book I’m quoting and I’m too lazy/disorganized to go rummaging through my library to find the exact quote), “The trouble with going soul-searching is you might find it.”  If you prefer Nietzsche, “When you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.”  Either way, the point is that over-indulging in self-examination generally leads to fewer answers and more questions.

Trains are a nice place to sit and think…You never know where you will arrive!

Trains are a nice place to sit and think…You never know where you will arrive!

On the other hand, I can’t say no to Strawberry, so I will tackle her introspective questions.  (For the record, my Firsty descends easily into introspection and I am the more spontaneous and in-the-moment portion of the partnership.  So PBBBT to you, Firsty!!)  Strawberry’s questions are listed here, and my answers are below…

  • Regardless of your current number, how old do you actually feel? I’m a perpetual 23 yr old.  On the cusp of beginning ‘grown-up’ life, if I ever figure out what that means.  Old enough that my parties are legal, young enough that they are still parties.  Maturity is kind of like sanity and reality… they are all states that I’m willing to visit sometimes, but I prefer not to live in any of them.
  • Which is worse, failing or never trying?  I can mouth the platitudes that it is nobler to try and fail than to never try, that a person who tries may sometimes fail but a person who doesn’t try never succeeds, etc.  Truth is, however, I generally live the other way.  I’d rather not air my inadequacies and failures for the world to see.
  • If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?  I already tend to live in the moment, so it’s hard to imagine how I would change.
The light is at the beginning of the tunnel… what does that imply?

The light is at the beginning of the tunnel… what does that imply?

  • Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? Like most people, I think I both try to do things right and to do the right thing.  Of the two, I think behaving morally is more important then behaving correctly.  But I worry more about correctness, because I’m very confident in my moral compass.  In hindsight I may question my actions, but I generally plunge forward confident that my impulses are good impulses.
  • Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?  Um, I’m pretty sure that I am a joyful genius, and therefore the best of both worlds.  Of the two, genius is a natural trait and joyful I have to work at.  Still, worrying is effort spent with no return and I am too lazy to work up a proper worry.
  • Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?  Yes. I do think I have the same fault as Strawberry.  I’m an internal, introverted person, so I respond well to others but don’t generally initiate contact unless I have a purpose/motive for doing so. I suppose I could worry or feel guilty about that, but as I just said, I’m too lazy to work up a proper worry.  I’m OK with how I am, and if I wasn’t I would change.  I have a few close friends who accept me as I am, and I’m not interested enough in being popular to change.

    Introspection: It's a walk in the park, so far!

    Introspection: It’s a walk in the park, so far!

  • Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?  Nope, I have trouble remembering what upset me five days ago.  As I said above, I live in the moment.  Yesterday is done, so there is no sense worrying about it.  Tomorrow may or may not come, so just be prepared to roll with what comes.  Now is the only thing that’s certain, so react accordingly.
  • At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?  OK, here is the admitted downside of living in the moment.  Any times I was passionately upset soon faded and passed.  Any times I was passionately not-upset fade just as quickly.  Like a yo-yo or a pendulum, I quickly return to my default state: a bemused observer, entertained by but ultimately somewhat detached from the world around me.
  • If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job? Yes and no.  I would use a big chunk of the money to enable my firsty to cut back down to one job.  (Purely selfish motive.  The time he spends working, fifty-five hours a week on average, cuts into the time I can spend existing.  Phooey on that!)  I would also give myself a bank roll that would let me shop like a mad woman.  And I would rework my schedule to devote more time to writing.  Not just blogging, but also fiction, and hopefully also freelance stuff.  My firsty would work less, but I would work more, doing work we both would enjoy more.

    Sitting and introspecting.

    Sitting and introspecting.

  • If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?  If it is everybody’s last day, my firsty is spending the day with his wife.  The rest of the world can go hang.
  • What do you feel is the difference between being alive and truly living?  If you are going through a routine, you are just alive.  When you are truly living, you are engaged on all cylinders, doing something you do well, with a feeling of purpose and being “in the zone.”  I probably spend a lot of time merely being alive… As I said above, I have a tendency to be an observer.  At the same time, when I’m writing, I’m truly living.  My firsty sometimes talks about ‘riding the catastrophe curve’ when he’s working, moments when its busy and hectic, when he is staying one step ahead of crashing and burning, succeeding by a mixture of skill and chutzpah… When you are riding the catastrophe curve, you are truly living.
  • If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?  Look around you, and you will see plenty of examples of people making mistakes and learning nothing.  Sure, we hope we will be different, that we will be the person who does learn.  But we know our mistake will definitely carry negative consequences and only possibly bring improvement.  So mistakes definitely have downside and only possibly have upside, which may or may not exceed the downside… we’d be crazy to not want to avoid mistakes.

    A pink forest?  That's just weird...

    A pink forest? That’s just weird…

  • What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?  Off the top of my head, nothing.  I’m pretty sure other people are going to judge me anyway.  I’ll get over it.
  • If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?  The best advice I ever got was from my grandfather.  He told me that as I walk my way through the world, I should make big tracks.  I.e. leave your mark upon the world, and leave the world a better place for having been there.

Finally, no post is complete without a few fashion credits… Skin: Sophia from WoW Skins.  Shape: Gigi Teen from Kids5B  Hair: Whisky in Caramel from LoQ Hairs  Outfit: (Dress, Coat, Boots, Pearl Necklace) Edelfabrik.

  1. Love your grandpa’s advice! Happy weekend to you! 🙂

  2. zeesl says:

    I’ve been reading everyone doing this meme and I have nothing but admiration. I don’t think I’m brave enough to attempt it. As always, I come here for something substantial to read, and I was not disappointed. Thanks, Em. ❤

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s